To the Mother Who Feels She Has Let God Down
I distinctly remember falling into bed exhausted from the busy day, and silently allowing tears begin to stream down my face.
We had four children at the time and our lives were busy, yet fun and rewarding. We had one child of our own and three children were in our guardianship through the authority of the state.
It is hard enough raising a child that you birthed, but parenting three children by different families that have not been raised in a certain atmosphere, that’s a whole different level.
That night as I snuggled down in my bed I began to tell the Lord how sorry I was that I had not been with Him that day.
I couldn’t figure out where to squeeze the time in with doctor’s appointment, staffings, meeting with the school, carting children around to their necessary events and appointments to be alone with God and just be still and talk with Him. I hadn’t read my Bible that day either. In fact, I wasn’t sure when the last time I had picked it up to read God’s love letters written just for me.
On this particular night, my heart was heavy and burdened with the knowledge that I was letting God down in this busy season of our lives.
Craving Spiritual Wisdom
It wasn’t too many days later that I attended a Women’s Ministry service and a white-haired beauty filled with spiritual wisdom stepped to the pulpit. I clung to every word that she said and felt that she was sitting across the table having coffee with me and pouring out Godly wisdom that I needed in that moment of my life.
She addressed the young mothers in the crowd that day.
She spoke of how in the midst of bottles, diapers, teething, teaching, correcting, and all things mothering that there were times it felt there was little time for God. This precious lady knew how it felt to be so involved in raising her children that she didn’t open her Bible that day.
There were times when she barely got a “Thank you, Jesus, for this day” out of her mouth. I sat there thinking “There were times she didn’t read her Bible? There were times she barely got her prayer time? So there are Mother’s that have been in this stage of life before, it’s not just me?”
She wanted to let us know that it wouldn’t always look like this and to give ourselves a little grace during this time.
Your Season Looks Different
We go through different seasons in our lives. My days look much different today than what it did even three years ago. I want to tell a mother out there who feels defeated in her walk with God that it won’t always look like this. Hold on, better days are ahead.
Our seasons of life look different than others. And that’s ok. Don’t look at others to try to compare yourself to because they may be in a different season than you are.
I would like to stop for a second and invite you to join my Facebook page. I know how it is going day to day and craving the Word of God and not knowing where to even begin to get the strength from God’s Word for that day. Come join our community of Christian mom’s and wives who are passionate about seeing their entire family thrive in God’s Kingdom.
While I was not in my prayer closet for hours a day, I was still doing the work of the Lord. I prayed over children whom I had the privilege to have in my home. Throughout my days I would talk to them about how much God loved them. I would sneak little snippets of Christ into their hearts and pray that they would always remember the love they felt while in my care.
God Sees You
Although you may not feel that you have checked everything off of your checklist for the day, you are still doing as God has called you to do.
While it may seem as if you are in the “thick of it” just remember that your season will not always look like this. There will come a day when your littles become more independent and you’re able to sneak in some quiet time with God. Or maybe they begin to sleep better through the night and you’re able to awaken early for Bible reading.
Enjoy this season you’re in for it will not always last. Know that God sees you and is proud of the love, effort and care you put into your child. He’s proud of you for focusing on the precious gift He has given to you. This season will not always last and one day the busy season will lift.
Keep praying through your days and thinking on His love letters to you. Memorize your favorite scripture and on the difficult days recall that Word. Stop beating yourself up and allow yourself some grace for this season. God sees just where you are.
